DECEMBER OF THE 2013 AUTOCULT CALENDAR

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December. Damn. Well, here we are at the end of our 2013 calendar project. And it was no accident that we ended where the AUTOCULT brand really started: a never-before-seen outtake of Jelena Jensen photographed by Ed Fox under the watchful eye of Coop and Lucky at Bobby Green’s Old Crow Speed Shop in Burbank, CA.

Now, we’ve written much about this shoot in past blog updates, but we’ll tell you another little story from that day: Once we had all descended upon Old Crow there on a somewhat hidden little cove on the mean streets of sunny Burbank, we started to set up for the shoot, like we always do. Y’know, get a lay of the land, find out which cars are actually able to move under their own power, where the power outlets are, directions to the closest In-N-Out, the usual.

And then…DISASTER STRUCK. We had no stripper lotion. NONE. Well, that’s not exactly accurate. The sauce we brought with us was no good. Jelena, as we quickly found out, has very delicate, sensitive skin and she informed us that the stuff we brought was no bueno – it would make her break out in hives. And that, we just knew, was gonna be even MAS no bueno.

So, we scribbled down exactly what she could be slathered in from head-to-toe, asked Lucky where the closest drugstore was and Coop spoke up with, “I know where that is.” Next thing we knew, we were in the car with the Dark Prince of underground art, himself, scooting across TV Town to the closest Walgreen’s. As we walked through the aisles of suntan lotion and cheap hair grease and Ace combs, we chatted about politics and art and the earliest days of the original rat rod movement and what the hell happened to good taste in cars and the scourge of shitty magazines that publish shitty photos of those shitty cars and then we turned the corner and it was like we could hear the angels sing as the sky parted and the sun shone down in Jesus rays: three full rows of perfectly-aligned little soldiers of Johnson’s Soothing Naturals Moisture Rich Unscented Nourishing Lotion in the 8oz. ergonomically-correct recyclable dispenser.

Perfect.

Coop grabbed a few bottles of the magical stuff that would surely save the photoshoot and avert disaster the day before Christmas. Singularly focused, we whizzed right past the aisle of model kits and the candied orange slices (that were on sale for a really, really good price, BTFW) without even slowing down, paid for the stash, high-tailed it back to Old Crow for a patiently-waiting Jelena and reaped the rewards of our labor by pretending not to watch Raquel rub Jelena down from tips-to-toes in it. Hey, skin needs to be glowing for a shoot like this –– an essential point that most, a-hem, “photo guys” don’t even come close to understanding when photographing girls with cars. Suckers.

Just an interesting little anecdote that most people, we’d guess, wouldn’t find themselves in the middle of and we thought you might dig on. It’s always the little things that we end up remembering when we’re working on the layouts for projects like this…

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